11/13/2016 0 Comments Dear 21-year old self,Dear 21-year old self,
Breathe. Breathe and remember that you had been in this place before. You are going to be okay. You'd been in this uncomfortable, anxious and scared and empty before, but you've SURVIVED. Breathe and know that you can survive this too. These feelings can't break you. They are painful and debilitating, but you can sit with them and eventually, they will pass. Maybe not immediately, but sometime soon they are going to fade. And when they do, you are going to look back on this moment and laugh for having doubted your resilience. I know it feels unbearable right now, but keep breathing, again and again. This will pass. I promise, it will pass.
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8/25/2016 0 Comments Stuck in the MomentHow I wish people are just like the trees. No matter how long you'll be away, you'd still end up finding them in the exact same spot where you left them.
3/21/2016 0 Comments It's all there is.3/18/2016 0 Comments Revisiting UVWell, I'm back.
Back to where I'm from. My college sanctuary, my home - always and will be. It was a rare chance to be rubbing elbows again with the people I used to be with when I was in college. Though skeptic about my experience as a panelist for a project defend, with just the idea of being with my co-teachers again, I'd gave it a go. The day went really well. In the end, you always go back to the people that were there in the beginning. 3/17/2016 0 Comments To my favorite "What-if" I like the stars. It always remind me of you.
We see the same sky. The same stars. But I know, we see different things. It was never easy letting go of the idea of you. Of the idea of us. Of the potential of us. I must admit I had too much of the "expectations" and now I realized how I was too short of "actions" back then. It had been a while since I stopped thinking about what had happened, but then suddenly I can't help but ponder about it a little. Did you really gave up? Was I the one to gave up? Or did we just gave up? I must have been crazy for getting such a big deal out of it all. I think it just frustrates me, I mean of all the "what-ifs" in my mind right now. I can see you really happy with your life. You've just earned your degree and had the time of your life with the people you treasure the most. I can see you really happy with her. Honestly, it makes me glad to see you that happy. A little jealous, actually. You have things in your life in order and here I am struggling to keep myself up. Somehow, I envy you. You've become so happy, so stable. And here I am facing a million little issues about my life. I remember I used to solve them with you back then, a very long time ago. Now everything has changed, we have changed and our lives have changed. We had completely grew apart. Sh*t, re-reading our old convo got me like this. I miss you terribly. But you're really happy now, I know. I mean, I'd already accepted our fate, it's just that it still makes me sad sometimes. You’re now another story I can’t tell anymore. Did you ever miss me? 1/1/2016 0 Comments Missin' the TV FamWe know we don't need to see each other all the time just to know we're still friends. True friends are not like that. We know we have to live our own life. We respect each other's journey. Nevertheless, we never fail to catch up with each other's current struggle and spend at least few random moments together as to maintain the ties we have. No matter how busy we get, I hope we never forget to reach out. We'll always have each other's back. I miss TV Days. I miss you all guys. Happy New Year :))
9/2/2013 0 Comments Growing up vs Growing OldAren’t you excited? I’m not. Why? I’m not yet ready. Relax. You still have a year to be ready. No. That’s not it. Then what is it? I’m not yet ready to face life behind school realm. I just wanna be in school forever. Life’s crazy. You should learn to grow up. I am. No, you’re not. What do you mean? Growing up is different from growing old. So? You’re only growing old. But you’re not growing up. Seriously? You’re afraid of responsibilities aren’t you? …… Growing up is never easy, i know. …… You should always have the courage within you, to become who you really are. (deep sigh) I don’t know. ……………………………………….. ………………………………………………………… ………………………………………………………………………….. Time flies. Yes it does. It waits for no one. Some time soon , I’ll be out of college. Soon I’ll bid goodbye to all those mind-boggling exams and projects and soon I’ll have to face the realm of reality behind my course. It’s more of fear than anything else. |